Somewhere on Earth. Spring Night. Sounds of crickets chirping.
“It was a decent into pure rapture, bliss, and ecstasy. Because for him, the only way up was to go down into Earth. Nothing higher than him, you know!” Grandma said.
“Granma, what is ecstasy?” the granddaughter asked. She was done with her 16th birthday celebrations-a very special occasion that was to be celebrated once in one’s lifetime. Both boys and girls went through a special ceremony (sacred rites as decided by the elder mothers and elder fathers) and celebration (food, dance, music) in that part of the world.
“It is like having your favorite dessert but many times over…” her Grandma replied.
Grandma was telling the child the story of how Svayambhu became Shiva.
“So on that particular day, after done dwelling upon this earth and beyond in his one and only incarnated body for thousands of years, Svayambhu sat in his final meditation. He knew that this was going to be his last day on Earth. He had already said farewell to his departed wife, Parvati, many centuries ago. Now he was ready to leave his body himself.” Grandma halted and took a deep breath.
“But Granny, you said that they both ascended together during their last samadhi.”
“yes, child, something like that…yes, humm. May be, I don’t know. Perhaps. I only know what he felt. It was quite beautiful.”
“So, what happened? Please tell me, please, please, please. I want to hear it before I go to sleep. Please…” the granddaughter asked after taking off the garlands of flowers around her neck, her ears, and her upper arms. She had already broken off the tiny threads that held the flowers together. Then she took a long sip of cool water from the pot while looking at the moonless night-sky sparkling with beautiful stars. Then she slowly inched towards her grandma and put her head in her lap. Grandma didn’t even notice as she was already in deep trance. Words poured from her mouth in a very quietly. You really had to be very close to her to hear them. They were almost inaudible -more like whispers.
“That was a special day. For all of us-because Svayambhu departed the 3rd dimension of Earth and became of Earth in his Mahasamadhi. He made himself available to us as a parting gift-now isn’t that wonderful. Oh, what an amazing being he is. Self-less, charitable, and so grand!
“He closed the doors of his great palace of stones and sticks that he had built himself-he went deeper into his cave in Himalayas. He sat in meditation. And just like any other day, he started his Kriya breaths. As usual, he went in and out of his body while doing the special breaths. Finally, he reached the exalted state. Snap! And he was inside himself going deep, deep, deep into himself. He had done that before many times. Thousands, millions of times.”
“He felt the low rumble below his body. It was as if Parvati, the Mother, his beloved wife, was talking to her Swami. She was saying, ‘follow me, play with me’. Feeling her touch, he gave himself up completely. And right before his body hit the ground in that cave, he experienced the following, knowing and being perfectly aware of what he was doing.”
Granddaughter yawned and drifted to sleep. She started snoring. Grandma didn’t notice. She continued her story. As if she was telling this story to herself. Tears started flowing as she recounted the next set of sequences.
“Grandeur! Freedom! Ananda! Oh, beauty thine name is thus -the Goddess. Ma! How beautiful was that for Svayambhu to experience that! He had never felt this kind of peace before. He became absorbed fully and wholly into himself. He immersed into himself -his own Shakti, his own energy, his own Ananda. Drops of Amrit became waves of Amrit only to turn into streams, rivers and finally cosmic oceans of Amrit. Pure Ananda. He vibrated lower, lower, and lower as he realized he couldn’t go up. The only way for him was to go down into his body and into the Earth. He shot himself down into Earth, penetrating one eon at a time in a very slow manner. Thus he shed time.”
“Gorgeous vistas of himself unfolded as the past, present, and future of the whole Earth emerged within him. He simply witnessed them as usual. But during this dive of all dives into himself, he experienced and witnessed both simultaneously. He talked-she listened. She talked-he listened. He became one with Earth. He became one with his Shakti. He realized he didn’t know what this complete merging into his own Shakti was until that moment. An eternal moment it was!”
“Finally, he reached the center of Earth. There, he beheld his own self as two co-existing Grand Selves. There he disappeared into himself. One Self was him, pure, absolute, grand, dark, Nothingness-Shunya. The other Self was still him-pure, everything, paratman, everything-ness, all-ness, he was wrapped around the whole creation-the supreme soul-Mahavishnu. The two-the grand black hole and the grand white hole both were One. When he opened his eyes, he became Mahavishnu-present everywhere in everything and everyone as a Supreme Possibility. He closed his eyes, he became Mahashiva-present everywhere in everything and everyone as a Supreme Impossibility. Oh-the joy he felt. Soaring through his infinite depths he had finally found himself.”
“He spent many eternities there. Blinking and breathing through his eyes-as he opened them, he brought everything into existence from within himself, as he closed them, he brought everything back into himself. After experiencing these endless cycles, he talked to the Mother. She said, ‘let’s go back where your body is’. He said, ‘No Devi! I want to stay here. Why go back?’ She said, ‘Because you have had enough. Don’t tease me like you always do and keep playing this game’. Thus, they played few games of this nature for few more eternities.”
“Then She said, ‘if you stay here any longer, you will abandon your creation prematurely and the creation will be absolved into you without knowing you. Don’t you want them to play for a bit like you and I did and then come home and be submerged into you?’
“Yes, you are right, Devi. I was being selfish. I forgot that they are still there. Now, let’s go back. I will go wherever you want me to go. I surrender to you. You create me as me.”
“And that is how Svayambhu became Shiva.”
“Then Shiva shot up through the same channel, Shushumna, through which he had gone down to Earth. He went back up to his body. His body still hadn’t hit the ground in the cave. He desired to do nothing without Shakti’s permission. He laid inert. He thought about entering the body again. Devi said ‘no. Don’t. Do this instead’. And then she laughed and danced. Her dance was so delightful and inviting that he lost himself into her. He experienced his state of being/nonbeing-ness again and again as he danced alongside her. For his every move was reciprocated by her. For her every move, he witnessed himself dancing. Absolutely marvelous! Beautiful tones, rich melodies mixed with joy and pain, interludes of peace and chaos, gorgeous vistas of civilizations to come, and civilizations that had passed danced before his eyes. The birds, the animals of past and future flared before his eyes as he danced. And he witnessed himself thinking, ‘oh, I already know all this’. And that made him surrender even more to her. He finally laid down in a complete awe of his own Ananda dancing upon him. He turned his gaze upon her, felt her-every single cell of her into him entrenched with pure love and bliss, her pains-joys-sorrows-beauty-the dynamic explosion of millions of orgasms. All at once. And he finally let go. His human body stopped dropping into the ground instead it now vibrated and absorbed deeper into the Earth. Fully materialized into Himalayas.”
“All of his 12000 nadis- the energy conduits and corresponding centers of energy-consciousness emerged as specific spots in the Himalayas. From jagged mountain tops to placid lakes and valleys, from endless deserted plateaus to dense forests, his body emerged as those geographical areas. He emerged as One with the Himalayas. He became Himalayas forever locked in a sweet embrace of his Shakti, calling upon all his creation into himself across the vast expanse of space and time. Waves upon waves of pure peace and bliss pouring forth, becoming nothingness, becoming his own selves. And he is still experiencing that moment -afresh, anew, every time any Yogi or Yogini reaches those towering heights of consciousness. Only to explode them with everlasting bliss-nova of nothingness. So, giving. So, forgiving. Giving himself to them. O Bholenath. The dimensionless Zero that contains all dimensions. Svayanmbhu, Shiva, Mahashiva, Shunya, Ananta. The great and supreme Void of Nothingness. Ommm, Ommm, Ommm…”
Grandma rested her head on the back wall of her bedroom one last time. She too became him and disappeared into him while recounting his story as hers.
“It was a decent into pure rapture, bliss, and ecstasy. Because for him, the only way up was to go down into Earth. Nothing higher than him, you know!” Grandma said.
“Granma, what is ecstasy?” the granddaughter asked. She was done with her 16th birthday celebrations-a very special occasion that was to be celebrated once in one’s lifetime. Both boys and girls went through a special ceremony (sacred rites as decided by the elder mothers and elder fathers) and celebration (food, dance, music) in that part of the world.
“It is like having your favorite dessert but many times over…” her Grandma replied.
Grandma was telling the child the story of how Svayambhu became Shiva.
“So on that particular day, after done dwelling upon this earth and beyond in his one and only incarnated body for thousands of years, Svayambhu sat in his final meditation. He knew that this was going to be his last day on Earth. He had already said farewell to his departed wife, Parvati, many centuries ago. Now he was ready to leave his body himself.” Grandma halted and took a deep breath.
“But Granny, you said that they both ascended together during their last samadhi.”
“yes, child, something like that…yes, humm. May be, I don’t know. Perhaps. I only know what he felt. It was quite beautiful.”
“So, what happened? Please tell me, please, please, please. I want to hear it before I go to sleep. Please…” the granddaughter asked after taking off the garlands of flowers around her neck, her ears, and her upper arms. She had already broken off the tiny threads that held the flowers together. Then she took a long sip of cool water from the pot while looking at the moonless night-sky sparkling with beautiful stars. Then she slowly inched towards her grandma and put her head in her lap. Grandma didn’t even notice as she was already in deep trance. Words poured from her mouth in a very quietly. You really had to be very close to her to hear them. They were almost inaudible -more like whispers.
“That was a special day. For all of us-because Svayambhu departed the 3rd dimension of Earth and became of Earth in his Mahasamadhi. He made himself available to us as a parting gift-now isn’t that wonderful. Oh, what an amazing being he is. Self-less, charitable, and so grand!
“He closed the doors of his great palace of stones and sticks that he had built himself-he went deeper into his cave in Himalayas. He sat in meditation. And just like any other day, he started his Kriya breaths. As usual, he went in and out of his body while doing the special breaths. Finally, he reached the exalted state. Snap! And he was inside himself going deep, deep, deep into himself. He had done that before many times. Thousands, millions of times.”
“He felt the low rumble below his body. It was as if Parvati, the Mother, his beloved wife, was talking to her Swami. She was saying, ‘follow me, play with me’. Feeling her touch, he gave himself up completely. And right before his body hit the ground in that cave, he experienced the following, knowing and being perfectly aware of what he was doing.”
Granddaughter yawned and drifted to sleep. She started snoring. Grandma didn’t notice. She continued her story. As if she was telling this story to herself. Tears started flowing as she recounted the next set of sequences.
“Grandeur! Freedom! Ananda! Oh, beauty thine name is thus -the Goddess. Ma! How beautiful was that for Svayambhu to experience that! He had never felt this kind of peace before. He became absorbed fully and wholly into himself. He immersed into himself -his own Shakti, his own energy, his own Ananda. Drops of Amrit became waves of Amrit only to turn into streams, rivers and finally cosmic oceans of Amrit. Pure Ananda. He vibrated lower, lower, and lower as he realized he couldn’t go up. The only way for him was to go down into his body and into the Earth. He shot himself down into Earth, penetrating one eon at a time in a very slow manner. Thus he shed time.”
“Gorgeous vistas of himself unfolded as the past, present, and future of the whole Earth emerged within him. He simply witnessed them as usual. But during this dive of all dives into himself, he experienced and witnessed both simultaneously. He talked-she listened. She talked-he listened. He became one with Earth. He became one with his Shakti. He realized he didn’t know what this complete merging into his own Shakti was until that moment. An eternal moment it was!”
“He spent many eternities there. Blinking and breathing through his eyes-as he opened them, he brought everything into existence from within himself, as he closed them, he brought everything back into himself. After experiencing these endless cycles, he talked to the Mother. She said, ‘let’s go back where your body is’. He said, ‘No Devi! I want to stay here. Why go back?’ She said, ‘Because you have had enough. Don’t tease me like you always do and keep playing this game’. Thus, they played few games of this nature for few more eternities.”
“Then She said, ‘if you stay here any longer, you will abandon your creation prematurely and the creation will be absolved into you without knowing you. Don’t you want them to play for a bit like you and I did and then come home and be submerged into you?’
“Yes, you are right, Devi. I was being selfish. I forgot that they are still there. Now, let’s go back. I will go wherever you want me to go. I surrender to you. You create me as me.”
“And that is how Svayambhu became Shiva.”
“Then Shiva shot up through the same channel, Shushumna, through which he had gone down to Earth. He went back up to his body. His body still hadn’t hit the ground in the cave. He desired to do nothing without Shakti’s permission. He laid inert. He thought about entering the body again. Devi said ‘no. Don’t. Do this instead’. And then she laughed and danced. Her dance was so delightful and inviting that he lost himself into her. He experienced his state of being/nonbeing-ness again and again as he danced alongside her. For his every move was reciprocated by her. For her every move, he witnessed himself dancing. Absolutely marvelous! Beautiful tones, rich melodies mixed with joy and pain, interludes of peace and chaos, gorgeous vistas of civilizations to come, and civilizations that had passed danced before his eyes. The birds, the animals of past and future flared before his eyes as he danced. And he witnessed himself thinking, ‘oh, I already know all this’. And that made him surrender even more to her. He finally laid down in a complete awe of his own Ananda dancing upon him. He turned his gaze upon her, felt her-every single cell of her into him entrenched with pure love and bliss, her pains-joys-sorrows-beauty-the dynamic explosion of millions of orgasms. All at once. And he finally let go. His human body stopped dropping into the ground instead it now vibrated and absorbed deeper into the Earth. Fully materialized into Himalayas.”
“All of his 12000 nadis- the energy conduits and corresponding centers of energy-consciousness emerged as specific spots in the Himalayas. From jagged mountain tops to placid lakes and valleys, from endless deserted plateaus to dense forests, his body emerged as those geographical areas. He emerged as One with the Himalayas. He became Himalayas forever locked in a sweet embrace of his Shakti, calling upon all his creation into himself across the vast expanse of space and time. Waves upon waves of pure peace and bliss pouring forth, becoming nothingness, becoming his own selves. And he is still experiencing that moment -afresh, anew, every time any Yogi or Yogini reaches those towering heights of consciousness. Only to explode them with everlasting bliss-nova of nothingness. So, giving. So, forgiving. Giving himself to them. O Bholenath. The dimensionless Zero that contains all dimensions. Svayanmbhu, Shiva, Mahashiva, Shunya, Ananta. The great and supreme Void of Nothingness. Ommm, Ommm, Ommm…”
Grandma rested her head on the back wall of her bedroom one last time. She too became him and disappeared into him while recounting his story as hers.
