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Saturday, September 13, 2014

Yeshua and the God of Five Senses

“So tell me, what did you feel when you saw that young girl in the market today?” Yeshua asked his oldest disciple, Mima. Mima had mixed ancestry. His face looked as Tibetan as his mother’s face and his body was stocky like his Greek father. Mima’s face was perpetually in grief. He had a shiny bald spot in the middle of his head. Yeshua made fun of his bald spot; Mima knew that Yeshua had no malice. He said, it was perfect to hold the nectar of the moon because you could see the moon even when moon is not out. This made Mima laugh out loud again and again when Yeshua went away on his pilgrimage to India. Yeshua made the arduous journey to India and back every few years and every time he passed through the town on the border of Tibet and Gandhar (modern day Pakistan), he would stay with Mima for few days to break the journey. Once Mima asked Yeshua why he made such arduous journeys. Yeshua always kept quiet. Mima eventually stopped asking these questions. But it became his lifelong question and pursuit to know about his friend’s aimless purpose.



  Mima replied back in response to Yeshua’s question, “I felt lust. I felt strange sensation of being in love, being taken by mad sexual urge, and at the same time being full of pure hatred towards myself and towards her.”

 Mima knew that the Master already knew but he wanted to hear it from his mouth.

  Yeshua asked, “Why be ashamed of it? Acknowledge it. It’s real. It’s now. It’s here. Know that the source of your anger toward the beggar boy afterwards is entirely due to your embarrassment about me knowing that you were blindly attracted to that girl.  Always be on look out for uncontrolled, rampant and unacknowledged emotions and then you will be able to witness it. Know that there is always harmony and that which we call love that guides the greater and smaller events, however malign or benign. ” Both fell silent.

  And with that silence, the two friends retired into their respective rooms in Mima’s house for an afternoon nap, which was on top of a hill overlooking the entire town. You can see miles from up there on a clear day. Himalayas were out in the distance in South, snow sprinkled fingers of smaller mountains stretched across the horizon in West and wide-open Tibetan plateau appeared in the North and in the East. From the house, one can view high desert vistas during the day and gorgeous skies filled with stars during the night. Mima had inherited the house on the hill from his father.


Yeshua told him that he was very lucky to have a friend like Mima because he had such a pure heart. He told Mima that the roof of his house was his favorite spot to meditate before entering sylvan Himalayan forests to the South. Mima felt very proud when he heard the latter.

  After the nap, Mima came out and sat next to his friend, who was stroking Mima’s beautiful Persian rug with his toes. Mima knew that his friend was not the one who enjoyed the riches but he was enjoying the sensation of the beautiful work mixed with the roughness of the material. Mima also realized that his friend felt ecstasy when he realized that Mima had bought that rug from a Persian family who all worked on it very hard for 8 long months and Mima paid them twice the price. Using that money, the Persian family was able to survive the long and harsh winter. Secretly, Mima had desired that this story would impress his friend. Yeshua gave the familiar ‘I know what you are thinking’ look to Mima. Mima again fell silent. He thought he would bury himself in the Earth if he could. He let out a deep sigh. He was beginning to realize the importance of a great deed had nothing to do with one’s own self but as a service to one’s greater Self which is comprised of other human beings. He felt ashamed and embarrassed. His rosy cheeks became red with shame and guilt. He was beginning to understand the act of selfless service.  He felt grateful that his friend was there to put things into perspective.

 Yeshua smiled at Mima’s infant daughter who smiled back at him and stared above Yeshua’s head. 


Because you see, when Yeshua talked, angels visited and listened. Such is the power of Love.

   Yeshua felt this was the right moment to talk. Yeshua rarely talked. But when he talked everyone listened. He talked spontaneously. He talked with great resonance as he felt his heart would churn and he would collapse if he didn’t talk.  He knew that these moments were rare and were special. His eyes would transfix. His spine would become straight. His face would appear calmer than usual. And there was something magical in that voice because it came directly from the Universal Heart.  And so, everyone listened.

    “When I was 22 years old, I healed the foot of my aunt Sophia. I didn’t know that it was broken. I didn’t know that she was in pain. I sat down to press her feet as I usually did every night. I felt warm tingling sensation in my hands and in my spine. I don’t remember what had happened. Only minutes later, my aunt Sophia poked me with her healed foot and said, ‘never talk to anyone about your gift, because the day you talk about it, is the day you will bring your current lifetime to close. Always give healing equally to those to deserve it the most and those who deserve the least. Do your work in secret and silence. Never trade the joy, tranquility and peace that healing brings you for the mental satisfaction of telling everyone that you did something good to them.’ I heal because I know that there is a greater power acting through me. I am only an instrument. I do not know how it happens. I simply open my eyes and ask Himzadi for his blessings. My eyes weep and my heart aches at their pain. I know in that moment that I am not this body. I know in that moment, that Himzadi is always present behind the scenes. I am only a pot very much like that one in the corner in which Himzadi pours himself. And just for that brief moment when he comes through me, I know that I and my Father are One.  I am the Father at that moment. My heart expands and becomes as big as that mountain.”

       Mima’s infant daughter chuckled. She looked back on top of Yeshua’s head. Her gaze became fixed as Yeshua wiped tears off of his eyes.



   “Himzadi is always present. He is present here now. My aunt Sophia knew this. She also knew other secrets but wanted me to discover them for myself. It was much later that I found out in my meditations that she was the Mother. Mima! the Mother was with me! She was my aunt. She let me touch her feet every night. I knew this always but just as the rust keeps coming back to that iron skillet of yours, our hearts become rusted with the rigid veils that we put on ourselves. Our hearts are tainted and our minds are dirty because we do not realize that the great Ananda and Love of the Father that sustains us. We think it is us that are doing this or that but Mima it is the Father that does everything. It is the Mother that does everything. This whole wide world is just him and her… There is no one else but them and their imperishable Love”.


     Mima’s infant daughter now started sucking her thumb and began tossing her feet in the air. Mima caught the feet and tickled the foot with his fingers. The baby laughed out loud in ecstasy. Mima felt her joy for the first time. He felt different. He felt anew. He felt good.

      “Mima, I must tell you a story.  It was long ago, even before this town was settled. I once went to India to see the Father with my aunt Sophia. I didn’t know then who he was (the Father). I just did what my aunt Sophia asked me to do. I trusted her deeply. On our way back from India, we were traveling with a caravan and stopped by in the dusty town in Anatolia (modern day Turkey). It was a very hot day; we had run out of water and food for our animals. We ourselves were parched. Instead of staying in town to drink, eat and sleep, I decided to take off on my own. Somehow I knew where to go. I walked and walked and walked till I came up on a hill so far away from the oasis that I forgot that it existed or where I had come. Night fell.  I felt weak with exhaustion and thought I was going to collapse. I sat down with the Frankincense that I had gotten from the Arabian bandits for healing their camels. I burnt only two pieces because they usually burn for two hours each. All the while when I was up there, I was in a different world. I felt so familiar with the rock I sat on. The rock was so smooth as if somebody had polished it. I sat down, half collapsed and half unconscious with hunger and thirst. I closed my eyes and then it began. I had a series of visions.” Mima looked at Yeshua in disbelief. Yeshua’s eyes were half closed and he had his gaze fixed out in the distance.


 That’s when Mima saw a rose-like flower that he had never seen before. It had come out of Yeshua. He could smell the Frankincense from that rose, and saw that rose entered his heart. Mima sat there in disbelief and awe. He felt incredible love towards his daughter for the first time. He kissed her tiny hands as the daughter looked at him and shrieked with ecstasy.

  “I always had visions ever since I was a child”, Yeshua continued, “But these were different. I have never had such visions. True visions are affirmations of something that is true about you and you will know it. Beware Mima! For there are false visions and true visions…I was covered with blue and white light. I stepped in a different world, much different than ours. I felt joy of that realm that is unparallel to ours but it is our destiny. There I saw myself on a throne sitting next to you. You wore an incredible crown adorned with jewels. You had golden white light emanating from your heart. You looked at me and asked me what love is. I replied back, ‘Love is the harmony between us, between things, between all, O Deva of Five Senses, however benign or malign.’ You smiled and said, ‘I know all about love. See how much I love my wife and these Apsaras! I give them the freedom to use me and my power to experience whatever they want.’ I said, ‘O Great King of Five Senses! Do not be a fool! For you are not the doer. You may be powerful and bedecked in jewels as these beautiful energies of yours traverse around you only by the grace of the Mother! Know thyself to be a greater spirit who does all the magic of movement and give you that experience of being. That spirit is the source. Not you, not I, not these Apsaras, !’ Then a fireball appeared out of your heart and entered your heart again. In an instant, you had created a soul. He appeared bright and radiant. But you were taken back. When I adjusted my vision to yours, I saw what you saw. You became occupied with lust as you saw the feminine form, much like the lust you showed towards that young girl in the market today, and at the same time, you also gravitated towards hatred as you saw the masculine form. There it was! The King of Five Senses, who had the elemental Deva and Devi in his charge, was now pitifully lustful and hateful towards the emanation of his own self as half Shiv and half Shakti ! The Spirit had chosen to teach you a lesson and to make you an instrument to create something out of you that reflected your inner nature; the nature that is in the process of being perfected and refined. You see, all that we see is his dance with his energy! His Love which is Her is what binds us out of that dance and makes us dance together with them! You gave in to your lower nature and gave up your throne! In an instant you were thrown down on the Earth by the Mother to experience and master these very emotions again.”

   Mima listened to the Master with teary eyes as he saw what the Master showed him these visions through his inner sight.

  Mima saw from the perspective of the young soul that he created whom he called Dhatu. He experienced purity of universal heart from Dhatu’s perspective and realized what Dhatu had first experienced was pure love as he was created. Love, which then became tainted with Dhatu’s own veil of illusion, i.e. distrust towards Divine and conflict towards its own self.

“You see my friend, Love is what keeps us together. Love is what creates us and to choose pure unconditional Love is our ultimate destiny. You chose hatred instead. And so, in order to bring your ego down and to teach you a lesson, the Mother threw you on Earth as the royal dancer to be and Dhatu as Petronas, the Roman general to be.”

Then Yeshua told Mima, the story of Petronas and the Royal Dancer...

Petronas and the Royal Dancer

Dhatu was given a lifetime as Petronas and Indra was given the lifetime as Petronas’ lover by the Mother so both can realize deeper truths of surrender and trust. Petronas as Dhatu was born in conflict, the very conflict in Indra, as distrust in the Spirit. If Dhatu wanted something, he would have it as if it was his inborn right. He was born in Rome about 500 years after the time of Yeshua. He grew up in the territories outside of Rome. He was put through a hard military training but with no purpose in mind other than protecting the outside territories of Rome. Petronas had loving parents, good teachers and kindred friends. He was brought up with a sense of loyalty towards Rome and the emperor. Petronas was invited in Rome when he was 30 years old to witness the celebration of emperor’s son’s birth. The emperor was old and was delighted that he finally had an heir. This was the only time Petronas met and saw the emperor. Petronas also traveled around Rome and its outlying suburbs, made acquaintances, and saw that Rome was corrupt and crumbling from within. The senators were corrupt and disheveled. The citizens of Rome had finer riches which were collected and assembled from territories but did not value each other. Rome was no longer the shining example of democracy and had become plutocracy and retched aristocracy. The government in Rome poisoned itself as if a scorpion had bitten itself and was in teeters as the emperor held on to his tiny amount of power over the inner circle in Rome.

Petronas became convinced that there was no such thing as higher power and that the world was a grim place. Petronas felt that the regime had absolutely no goal in mind, there were no ideals to follow, and there were plethora of fictitious enemies created by the government to keep the citizens occupied with ever looming threat. Petronas looked on and realized that even if such enemies did exist, there would be none to defeat them, as none would be able to lead an army. No one cared to retain the autonomy of the city-state. Instead, he noticed, they bickered and plotted against themselves. They had no greater reason to live other than pry on each other and live like vermin and insects at the bottom of a briny cesspool.



 Celebrations of emperor’s son’s birthday started. After watching the emperor make fool of himself in front of hundreds of people in a gladiator ring, Petronas approached the emperor in the middle of the night with a knife in his palace. Petronas was filled with conflicting emotions: he felt sad about the senile emperor and at the same time disgusted with his inability to hold on to his power. He seemed to care about Rome and a fictitious ideal and at the same time he became violent at the very thought of his attachment to Rome. With the sharp blade pointed two inches away from the emperor’s throat, he smiled wickedly as he awakened the king with by kicking his knee. ‘Give me five Anatolian territories to the East and I shall leave you unharmed.” He said to the emperor. “You can continue your charade only here in Rome but no further. I will send you your share five times a year but I want an absolute control and a complete autonomy over the Anatolian territories.” Emperor yielded, he had no choice.

 And so Petronas became his own idol. He worshipped himself. He became occupied with getting things right for their own sake if it suited his fantasy. He had no inner goals to follow, no higher vistas of truth to reach, no riches of the soul to enjoy; so he devised his own versions of Truth. When the wise opposed his rule with positive criticism, he threw them in jail or executed them. He showed compassion at times and showed merciless and senseless idealism at other times. He raped young village women and donated houses to the widows. He rode his horse out in the country for days by himself, killed deer and wildlife with his crossbow, dragged the carcasses of the animals behind his horse and left them out for vultures.



He rescued little baby wolves from the predators by letting them cut through his flesh to save the puppies and he ordered orphans to be killed at the monasteries. His outer nature became torn in many ways. His inner nature stifled. He became dead as a dry well in the middle of Anatolian dessert…until he met the royal dancer.”

  Yeshua paused and swept the sweat off of his eyebrow, as he seemed to process much of Petronas’ anger and un-channeled energy. He lifted the infant in his arms and kissed the cheeks and sat her on his lap. It was a night filled with bright stars and the baby had been playing after her nap and dinner. Mima, his wife and the baby sat next to the fire as Yeshua kept the baby on his lap keeping her feet warm by waiving his palm over the fire. Mima’s wife noticed that the fire seemed to burn from nowhere and that there was no wood. Too tired to say anything and too elated to witness the magical fire, she finally put her head down in her lap and fell asleep after a busy day’s work.

 Mima listened to his friend talk for hours into the night. He recalled bits and pieces of his future lifetime.

 Mima saw himself as a young boy full of radiance and purity of heart. His body emanated a pure fragrance. He trained as a dancer and gave his life to the art of dancing. He loved and learned by spinning with the twirling saints of the desert, the Dervishes.



 He meditated while dancing and saw himself as an elaborate dance between the Mother, the experience of being, and the Father, the consciousness. He was filled with life and every moment was spent in ever lasting joy and ecstasy. He saw himself being lured into lower nature by the Asuric energies of lust, impatience, anger and hatred by others around him. But he maintained his pure essence and loved every one. He learned to surrender and trust the Divine. He faced many challenges but came out with deep sense of fulfillment as he realized himself to be an instrument and gave himself completely. He became content and was filled with Divine Ananda. He was quite young and had reached the higher state of being.

            Finally, one day Petronas arrived in the town to collect the tax. As the town folk gathered to see their infamous ruler, the young dancer felt that Petronas was his way out of that body and that lifetime. He (Mima) then realized that he was the Deva of Five Senses, Indra, who was given the body of this young boy by the Mother. Mima/Indra’s heart was filled with awe and respect for he had given up his throne and pride and felt fulfilled. To further aid his spiritual progress, he realized that he had to give into Petronas’ desires. He made his way towards Petronas’ royal court.

 Meanwhile Petronas pursued his desires relentlessly. He adopted the young dancer as son. He confided in him; he never did confide in anyone. He felt himself anew with novel energy. He tortured the young boy. He raped the young boy. He showed genuine concern and care as was his conflicted nature; all the while Indra/Mima realized that what he had experienced in the etheric realm while giving birth to Dhatu (Petronas), was unfolding here in this lifetime. Year after year, month after month, day after day, hour after hour, minute after minute, moment after moment, Royal Dancer/Indra/Mima gave up every bit of himself and surrendered completely to the Divine Will. As the eve of his departure from that lifetime arrived on a crisp fall morning with red/yellow leaves on the ground, he smiled at Petronas who stood there with his crossbow aimed at the dancer. As the dancer glazed a smile, Petronas let out an arrow which hit the dancer right between his eyes, ‘...shhhnappp…’ All of a sudden Mima woke up to the warm morning sun coming through his open window on the top floor overlooking the mountains to the SouthEast.

How did I get up here? He thought. Yeshua was gone, he noticed.


And while Mima reflected on the story from the previous night and sat with heavy heart, Yeshua appeared again. He smiled and said, “Dear friend, I travel because I want to see the father in me and because I want to see the father in others.”


Mima realized that his old friend and guru Yeshua had answered his lifelong question and finally understood what he meant.

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